Del Saunders - Stories and Tributes

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AFA Tribute

The Wasp and the Jockstrap

At the time of the merger of National Provincial and Westminster Banks in 1970, Del was asked by the newly formed NatWest Cricket Club to form a 4^th XI cricket side, knowing that he would be able to get a team out each week mainly from players he knew from  the football club. As it turned out, at a later stage this would become a thorn in the cricket club’s side because many of the players that formed the 4^th XI had the natural ability to play in higher elevens in the cricket club but chose to play only for the 4thXI or not at all.

 This was all down to Del, who created such a good atmosphere and team spirit in the first couple of years, that whenever short of players at the eleventh hour he could call on guys who had not the slightest notion of playing cricket. They would play in order to help out, knowing that they were with their football mates. Of course, fielding positions such as ‘extra cover’ and ‘long on’ were quite alien terminology and it was more a case of, "Do you see that patch of daisies over there, well go and stand next to them and if the ball comes your way throw it back to the bloke wearing overgrown oven gloves next to that bunch of sticks”. Quite a lot of hidden talent was unearthed in this way and the 4^th XI went on to become known as ‘The All Stars’. All down to Del.

 As to his cricketing ability, an MCC member might have  described it as ‘unorthodox’ but Del would put everything into the game. He was a superb fielder, finding his niche at gulley and taking many a spectacular catch one handed. Well, it had to be one handed because invariably he was holding a fag in his other hand!

He would also open the batting alongside Paul 'Big Will' Williams. Now whilst  Big Will would be smashing the ball to all parts of the boundary, Del’s role would be more benign, waiting for the right ball to slash through the gulley area, his only shot.

But perhaps Del’s most memorable match was not for the cricket but for a very unfortunate incident.

It was against Chipstead & Coulsdon 3^rd XI and unusually we were playing at their first team ground, set in a tiny corner of North Surrey countryside and surrounded by fields and woods with not a dwelling house in sight

Now picture the scene, it was a quintessentially English summer’s day. The sky was blue, a few fluffy clouds and warm sunshine pervaded. Sheep were in the fields  grazing and minding their own business. Cuckoos were in the woods,….well, ….cuckooing. The tranquil scene was broken only by the sound of leather hitting willow and the occasional cry of ‘howzaat’.

The players’ wives and girl friends,  sitting in deck chairs outside the pavilion, were carrying  on with their girlie conversations and just about to start preparing the players’ tea; - cucumber sandwiches and scones and jam, washed down with a cup or two of  Earl Grey no doubt.

Suddenly there is a commotion on the boundary where Del is fielding. The ladies stop their chatter and look up.

“What IS that man doing over there?”, they ask.

 Del could be seen hopping about from one foot to the other. Was he enacting some sort of Indian war dance,  or perhaps was he rehearsing some moves for a break dancing competition to be held later that evening.

No, it was neither of these. It turned out that a wasp had had the temerity to fly up his trouser leg, and now it was heading for his nether regions. What it’s intentions were no one knows, but Del was in a blind panic. In order to try and extricate the wasp he undid his trousers and pulled them down to his ankles, continuing with the break dancing routine. With this, the ladies were aghast, covering their eyes with their hands in embarrassment but at the same time peering through the gaps between their fingers to see what was happening.

 “Oh is that what a jock strap is”, one young lady was heard to remark.

 Obviously her loved one had not yet entrusted her with the privileged responsibly of washing his sweaty sports gear

By this time much to Del’s relief,  the wasp seemed to have lost interest and buzzed off to look for someone else to annoy. Del re-adjusted his trousers,  tranquility was restored and play resumed.

Funnily enough, the "All Stars" never played at that particular ground ever again.

Dudley Winnen

The Beer Can and the Beggar

One of my many fond memories of Del was on Football Tour abroad. (I can’t be more specific on the venue, but beer-blurred memories and age does that to you).

However, I do recall a walk to a bar where the Dave Bedwell’s Big Band Sound was playing. Del, along with a few of the lads, saw a stranger sitting in a doorway holding a beer can. Del bent down in his direction and unknown to the rest of the lads he did or said something that angered the fellow. He instantly jumped up shouting and swearing, and chased Del who managed to duck the beer can thrown at him. Despite the fact that the half dozen N.W.B.A.F.C. lads far outnumbered the solitary man, everyone ran for their lives like scared little girlies. Some 100 yards or so later, the chase stopped, and whilst huffing and puffing, and changing of mindset from “scared witless” to “hilarity”, Del was asked what happened.

It transpired that when Del bent forward he places a coin in the chap’s beer can, which really pissed him off. When asked why he would do such a thing, Del smiled and said “Well…. you know…..I thought he was a beggar!”

Bill Relyea

Sumo Del

It was 1982 when I started playing for NWBAFC and Del was my first captain. We didn't win much but we did seem to do a lot of celebrating - from what I remember! Then a whole new world opened up to me when I went on Easter Tour. Most of it is very vague and it was always a joy to attend the end of season dinner and read the NOTB and find out what on earth had happened. It got worse when I went on a later tour to Croatia and shared a room with Del and Frenchie - I wish he'd stop kissing me!

I met up with Del again at The Daragon’s summer barbecue in 2003. It was a warm afternoon and I was sitting on a wooden garden bench with a beer minding my own business watching the little Headless' playing with little Daragons when Del came over and sat down next to me. The bench was fine when I sat on it but when Del’s massive weight combined with my own it suddenly went horribly wrong. There was a creaking sound followed by a large cracking noise the bench collapsed and we both ended up in the flower bed. Now as I said the bench was OK with just me sitting on it but when Sumo Del sat on it…..

Many happy times over the years spent with Del mainly at Norbury but later at Lower Sydenham always with a beer and a fag, normally followed by a kiss and a cuddle!

Shaun ‘Headless’ Rodway

Driving Miss Del

I remember one Saturday night at Norbury when Del had a few more pints than the usual half dozen and even after offers of staying at Fran’s and having warmed up curry for breakfast or going home with DC and ending up in Brighton, or staying at Chels’ and watching Chelsea videos all night, he still decided to drive home.

 The following week he told us that he had been stopped by the police on his way home for having a faulty back light, fearing the worst he staggered out of the car to engage the police officer, which he certainly did, because after the officer asked him where he had come from and what he had been doing he found out that the officer had connections with the AFA and had played in the SAL. There was lots to talk about then.

After about an hour and a half chatting about football they shook hands, the officer getting back into his car probably totally inebriated from the fumes coming from Del’s mouth, thinking what are lovely person Del was, and wondering why he had stopped him in the first place.

Geoff Kates

Zatopecker

I have never doubted the inner strength and courage Del displayed all those years ago when running home pretending to be Emil Zatopek and had an unfortunate accident with a lamp post. This of course resulted in a very embarrassing visit to the local quack and an explanation as to how you cut your dick!!!.

Andy Crawford

You're Breaking My Heart

The problem is that like all funny tour stories, you had to be there, but here goes anyway. On my first tour (affectionately know as Isle of Wight 1) there was a stage in the bar on which several acts performed, notably Tony Hawkes (Will you wash my father's shirt) and Del Saunders (King of the Road, no change there then).
One evening there was a lull in the cabaret and the general mood of the tour party was about to turn ugly. Into the breach stepped the one and only Del Saunders with, as he described it, a sad song which required every one of us to get into the mood.
It wasn't long before he had the whole of the once mean & ugly mooded (is that a word) tour party on their knees, hands together, half crying (some may have been half laughing) in expectation of Del singing this very sad song.

Then when he knew he had us in the palm of his hand he broke into his rendition of 'Daisy'. Pure class!
Told you, you had to be there.

Smurf

Fagged Out

Returning to Heathrow from Guernsey, in the early 1970’s, we had played on the Monday morning in the pouring rain. A good game that resulted in very wet kit, a changed strip carried in a large holdall by one of the smallest in the party – Del.

Yes you’ve guessed it, he was stopped by a customs officer, who gleefully delved into the bag, only to find wet muddy shirts. The rest of the party watch through a window and they of course let him through after the embarrassed officer got the ‘ump. In the usual laid back Del Saunders style, completely unruffled, he broke into a broad smile and said “Good job he didn’t look in the other bag, it had a whole lot of fags I didn’t declare.”

Martin Rowland

Smoking Del

One night on holiday in Rhodes we were in a nightclub and Del was sitting by a vent out of which came the vapour from a dry ice machine. As he was halfway through a cigarette the dry ice machine was turned on, immediately The Pope (Paul Tutill), yelled “Watch it Del your trousers are on fire.” Del left his seat like a Exocet missile only to realise that there was no fire and he was in fact wearing shorts! - Mind you were told by the Pope that you were on fire I guess you’d be a bit concerned.

On freezing cold morning one tour, the virgin tourers were told that the coach had broken down and they were ordered by the Club Owner to get out and push. At that moment Del emerged from the hotel, being the kind chap that he is he went to give them a hand (with all Del’s weight behind it the coach would soon be moving!!!). Just as they began to push, Cliff, the driver, started the engine on a ‘cold start’, blowing all sort of crap from the exhaust. Several virgins returned to the coach coughing and spluttering..... what of Del? - Moments later he emerged from the smoke – with a fag on!

Frannie

Lost in London

Del gave myself and Twizzle a lift back to Norbury one winter's night from Barnet after the ‘Twoheys’ had played on that sloping pitch by Underhill.

We'd had a few pints after the match and he was soon on a mission to get us all back to HQ for more pints of numbers. All was going great and we were soon zipping across London Bridge, shortly after which we took a sharp left through the backstreets. Cunning fox I thought, he knows a shortcut. Minutes later I was surprised to find us heading over Tower Bridge followed by another left along the river, then eventually another left to cut back over (possibly) Blackfriars Bridge.

Now Twizzle and I were glancing at each other, saying nothing, not wanting to appear rude or put that lad out of his stride. He was chatting away like he does, not a care in the world, until he suddenly turned to us and just came out with it.

"Here lads..... What side of the river are we on?"

Mark Allen

70th Birthday Messages

Del

I’m not sure where to start.

Some might say the fact that you made it to 70 borders on the miraculous, whilst others will no doubt believe you reached this milestone many years ago!

However, those of us who know you from old, will appreciate how looking after your body has ensured you have remained at the peak of your prowess and enhanced your legendary status across several of Europe’s more notorious locations.

Being the grandmother of all codgers, it could well be said that you have led your flock by example and by virtue of the fact that your attendance has always been seen as a good thing, by a good number of wives and girlfriends, has ensured the leash under which I am tethered has always been that little bit looser.

Having a temple as a body is also something I have always admired and although I understand Big Leroy no longer gets as many airings it used to during its heyday, hopefully it’s enjoying retirement every bit as much as yourself.

On a semi-serious note, Elaine and I are always amused by the cards we receive each year and both Aimee and Alain are always tickled by the choice of cards you make. It’s not so much you remember, but the fact that you take the trouble of sending a card which is always deeply appreciated.

I’m sure your big night will prove to be memorable, so have a great time.

Pierre, Elaine, Aimee and Alain

Del

Quite simply you played a massive part of my life when I first came to London and was introduced to Norbury - Affectionately known as Mr NWBAFC' - A quality boundary fielder for 'All Stars' - Dolly Tubs on a summers day !! - You were one of the reasons I stayed.

After suffering two pieces of ill fortune on the same night, whilst on tour in the Isle of Wight, I turned to you (Del) for comfort and advice only to be told - 'It's terrible mate - They come in 3's'

Happy days Del and long may they last.

A very big Happy Birthday

Tony, Cathy and Megan Hawkes xx